There’s not much that’s more embarrassing than someone walking in on you having sex. But at least you’re getting some. What’s more embarrassing is trying to get some 90’s cyber sex action and being owned by the person you thought was gonna give it up… virtually…
For ultimate cyber fun, check out these guys (SFW).
Where Are All The Hoes? [Holy Taco ]
The Most Satisfying Motorcycle Wheelie FAIL [Gorrila Mask]
The Hottest Time Waster You’ll See All Day [Busted Coverage]
The Best Movie Title Hack Ever [EHOWA]
Hilarious Flashmob You Haven’t Seen Yet [YouTube]
The Hottest Airline Calendar Ever [DJMICKV2]
If You’re on Facebook, You’ve Got To Add This Guy [REDBEARD]
68 Girls Wearing Belts Instead of Bras [COED Magazine] NSFW
This is What $150 Beer Looks Like [The Bachelor Guy]
Umm… What Do You Gotta Do to Win This? [Don Chavez]
Now, THIS is How you Throw a Wedding [Guyism]
Hot Girls and Guns! [Gunaxin]
Hotties in the Wild [Uncoached]
Please, Please, Please Let This Work [Asylum]
Ashley Greene: The Only Good Thing About Twilight [Stay Here]
15 U.S. Beers That Pack a Punch[Flavored Delights]
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“It’s the second most stolen book in the United States right after the Bible” said Neil Strauss in reference to his book Rules of the Game on the popular radio show Toucher and Rich in Boston. This obviously piqued my interest. The book is billed as the be all, end all guide to picking up women and it’s written by Neil Strauss who wrote such kick ass biographies as “Dirt” about Motley Crue and “How To Make Love Like A Porn Star” about Jenna Jameson.
I’m a lonely, lonely man and my pick up technique of telling girls I’m “the bassist from the band Ace of Bass, and that’s right I am the ace,” wasn’t working (probably because Ace of Base didn’t actually have a bassist). Rules of the Game is designed like a textbook for picking up women with daily lessons and lasts 30 days so I decided to take the challenge and chronicle my experience. Here’s what happened:
We start our adventure by assessing ourselves with several questions.
Q: Describe how you think people see you?
A: Probably with their eyes, I believe it involves light refraction and such. Unless they’re blind then well… I guess they’d make easy victims. Actually, most people see me as a funny guy with no broads.
Q: Describe how you want people to see you?
A: Through telescopes looking up at me in my sky castle! Bwa ha ha ha! Okay how about as a funny guy with tons of broads.
Q: Identify 3 behaviors you want to change.
A: Not getting laid, not getting any vagina, and being without access to vagina.
Q: 3 Characteristics you’d like to adopt.
A: Kicking Bill Engvall in the nuts, having movie star good looks, and receiving more free tacos.
The next section is a list of “limiting beliefs” that hold you back. “People aren’t judging you, actually they desire your approval as much as you desire theirs.” I guess this means I should begin each conversation with women by yelling the reminder “You demand my approval!” Here’s another one, “Just ask women what they want.” I guess this implies that all women are inherently prostitutes who charge different rates and enjoy being propositioned with phrases like “How much?”
Alright let’s move on to the “Small Talk” section. The book gives several examples to use with fill in the blanks to customize them for every situation you’ll ever run into.
Current Events: Did you hear that —— ? What will they think of next!
Here’s what I used, think of your own, don’t steal mine.
Did you hear that ducks are rape proof? What will they think of next!
Entertainment: Did you see the new —— movie yet? I heard it was good.
Mine: Did you see the new rape fantasy porno yet? I heard it was good.
(more…)
This picture was sent in by a TopCultured reader who found this gem in a bathroom at a rest stop in Maryland. Guess in MD they’ve got problems with people putting toilet paper in their mouths BEFORE they flush it… Either that or they’ve just got a problem with Lanny. For more funny, click here.
If You’re on Facebook, You’ve Got To Add This Guy [REDBEARD]
The Best Football Celebration Dances EVER [Holy Taco]
Rejected Mortal Kombat Fatalities [Gorilla Mask]
Hot Girls Playing Twister. What Else Can Be Said? [COED Magazine] NSFW
Coolest Thing You Could Ever Do With A Vacuum [Guyism]
Proof That Halloween Isn’t Always Sexy [Don Chavez]
It’s Normal To Be Afraid Of Tyler Perry [Stay Here]
Everyone Loves McDonalds, Especially Thieves [Uncoached]
Guy Gives The Best Excuse Ever [Yep Yep]
The Best Video You’ll See All Week [Lemon Drop]
Should Your Grandfather Say No To Prostitutes? [Next Round]
**Want your link on our next list? Send them to topcultured [at] gmail [dot] com**
Most alarms require you to enter some sort of pin code to arm and disarm the device. This one goes a bit beyond that, forcing you to fap in order to protect your belongings. Hey, I’m not complaining…
source: unknown
Marriage isn’t for everyone, but if its for you, you may want to read up a bit. If I’ve learned anything in life, it’s that you can always believe what you read on a sign. So go on, read, and learn a little before you jump the broom. Here are 14 lessons signs have taught us about wives. Oh, and if you need help winding a wife… boom!
1. As your number of anniversaries go up, opportunities for sex go down
There has always been a section of the cereal aisle I have never dared to go. A section dominated solely by the most evil cereals, cereals forged by the spoon of Satan himself. Now I have never been a superstitious individual, I own a black cat, I step on cracks, and I have repeated the name Tyler Perry three times which I’ve been told makes Tyler Perry release another atrocious movie (maybe I should stop that just in case). But some taboos you just don’t violate (like this one), better safe than sorry. Here are some examples:
1. Never feed a Mogwai after midnight,
2. Never step on a butterfly if you end up traveling back in time
3. Never marry Barbara Streisand, and
4. Never mess with the occult before lunch
(more…)
Whoever thought some fame-hungry family (that isn’t Octomom or that god awful Kate plus eight) would ever grab attention again after being on Wife Swap? Who watches Wife Swap anyway? Regardless, today’s ’stunt’ as some are calling it, did just that when a kid (with the most badass name ever, Falcon? Are you kidding me?) hid in a box. Serious, your 15 minutes of fame consists of you hiding in a box and wasting people’s time. Anyway, it seems the story got the Fresh Prince treatment, and here it is:
